Itt is important not to judge because. Watch next delay stall blue lightening gray behind pruned tiles of my toepads after work when my socksareoff. Ugly man loves imaginary lady. who stares in the mirror in another world crumpling her nose up. Say who you are say the truth make it plain.
The plain truth is dire, silt weight gathering on the cloistered nodes of my esophagus when the shit voice escapes. Oh, angel. How like a hundred demonic nightmares must’ve happened real quick in a relay while someone working at a rehab spent something like five minutes trying to wake me up. And I came home the other night and the door was already open because the guy who runs this place was trying to wake up my roommate on the couch, who was doing the same thing.
But I do not know I think it is strange even as I am typing this on the perfect verge of multiple disparate emotions sliding their ways past one another. If this nit lit a brief of hay I’d feel that fire on unfacing side of the moon. I’d curl up in a Mylar blanket and cry so my faceplate steamed. Wind-winded lost signals waving out past me like a cocoon of past TV stations and radio broadcasts and internet buffoons.
I have no hand until it is on fire. And I just remembered, the essence of words is puff. Puff of smoke, inhaled exhaled, puff of capillaries inhaled exhaled inhaled. Could it ever be possible to dream into reality your own life’s missing companion and call it love? Like ooo, the crowd goes ooo. Like it’s a thing to think about but already there’s something understood: that this is sad. This is sad and there is no getting past it. The whole work of being alive is doing the work of being alive and you are just you and you have only you to blame. Love-nuts. Stir-crazy. Blappizent. Spick filled. Drench lunged. Xou Lei. Fur warm. Naught sill. Too much. Envy in the eyes. Panic in the face aware the communication is not getting through. Rest rest for now.
You were me as a newborn baby and I was my father just holding you. Thinking something vague but not really because all I can do is feel and how do I feel right now if it isn’t the truth? Maybe something rather good like I made this thing wow or wow I made another one or God I could eat there is a McDonald’s nearby. Who knows.
The truth is
hey!
The truth is. Hey. Pulling her arms up the center of the air to adjust height she makes little gestures at oncoming cars to signal the passage of traffic and I am passing through. This city this town this neighborhood my room. The solitary breath before a silence booms and conscious nixed fades. Hale on the roof hale shoes. Walk that way walk this way. She lives in my room. She calls herself a cell phone she calls herself a client she calls herself the apocalypse she calls herself quiet I walk to the window to see the sky under construction I walk to the window and and feel deja vu.
I walk to the bed to the chair to work I walk to the sound of songs in her news. She twists the cord of the lick I played into an opinion about being alive and thinks I should end it already. I tell her to be nice I tell her to leave. She walks through the shallows of a swamps to my room and lies down on my body and wakes me up from that dream. Her hair is silver her eyes are limit marks over swimming holes. Her legs are Genus placepicus her voice is the country Whales. Her name is Mardo Demia her name is Rauncet her name is Time. Her eyelash shattered the globe when it fell and I died.
We lived over like a hundred years together. She was born in a factory; she was picked from a vine. Her name is Penelope her name is Janice her name is Time. How swoon digs the earth worm’s struggle post rain to find light. How connected it feels to feel connected how it feels when another person’s touch meets empty headed absence. I Was Just There I was making Up Movies. I was Just her name is I was Just There when in Time I will not have to worry about trusting you or being worth your Time heals all wounds; all wounds heal Time moves nowhere and it’s beautiful Why?
Nowhere and it’s beautiful Why?